Trying is the first step to failure: Homer Simpson's rules of life (47 photos)

One way or another, each of us has people who are guideposts. Even those who say they have no idols don't really understand that they are their own guides.





The so-called “examples” can be not only positive, but also negative. Looking at such people, we say that we would never do this in our lives.



But there are also those who have not found an idol for themselves. We present to your attention the rules of life from the collective image of the head of the American family, one of the most famous fathers of America - Homer Simpson.





I don't see any point in leaving the house. We still come back every time.



If you really want to achieve something in life, you have to work hard at it. And now it’s quiet: the winning lottery numbers will now be announced.



I like the beer to be cold, the TV to be loud, and homosexuals to burn in hell.



You know, guys, you can laugh, but it’s much more pleasant for me to feel the sweet breath of a sleeping wife on my neck than to stuff dollar bills into the thong of some unknown lady.



Calm down, don't panic. If anything, I'll make money by selling one of my livers. Both are of no use to me anyway.



Children is our future. That's why they must be stopped today.



Let's drink to alcohol - the source and solution to all our problems!



Beer... My only weakness. My Achilles heel, if you will.



Education won't help me. Every time I remember something, it takes up space, pushing something else out of my brain. Like the time I took a winemaking course and forgot how to drive a car.



Catholicism has more stupid rules than a video store.



Of course, dad did a lot of good in his life, but now he is old, and old people are absolutely useless.



Women are like beer. They look good, they smell good, and you'd step over your own mother to get them.



Children are the same monkeys. They just make more noise.



Ha ha ha! My daughter thinks vampires are real creatures! Yes, they are fictional, like elves, gremlins or Eskimos.



I won't go to bed with a woman who thinks I'm lazy. If so, let him pull out the sofa in the living room and make the bed. I want to sleep.



My favorite book: So You Decided to Sign Up for Cable TV on Your Own.



Radiation only kills those who are afraid of it.



It’s not easy to be torn between a pregnant wife and an unbalanced child, but I still carved out my eight hours of watching TV.



Kill the boss?! Will my hand rise to fulfill the American dream?



It takes two to lie. One lies, the other listens.



Trying is the first step to failure.



Look, people always have some statistics for everything. This is known to 14% of the population.



The only important thing in life is to be popular.



A nuclear reactor is like a woman. You just need to read the instructions and press the right button in time.



We don't need a psychiatrist. We ourselves know that our child is disabled.



I see the smiles of my children. And I understand that they are up to something evil.

I won't lie: being a father isn't easy. Not like a mother.



Unguarded breakfast is the sweetest taboo.



When it comes to compliments, women become irrepressible blood-sucking monsters and demand more, more, and more. But if their desire is satisfied, the payment will be sweet.



God bless the atheists!



You can be great at something, but there will always be a million people who do it even better.



In sports, the main thing is not winning. The main thing is to get drunk!



You can't constantly blame yourself for something. Blame yourself once and move on with your life.



Sometimes I am capable of killing in a fit of anger or to prove that I am right. But I'm not some maniac.



In France, no one calls me “fat idiot.” I'm a foodie here!



There are no bad donuts.



Simply name your third offspring Child. Believe me, this will save you from unnecessary confusion.



You can work several jobs at the same time and still be lazy.



I have climbed the highest mountains, descended into the lowest valleys. Traveled to Africa and Japan. He even flew into space. But now, without hesitation, I would trade all this for something sweet.



Be more generous in bed. Share a sandwich.



Sometimes I lie in bed and think that nothing will make me get up. And then I feel it getting wet underneath me, and I realize that I was wrong.



A fool and money are quickly parted. I would pay a lot to anyone who could explain this pattern to me.



Give a man a fish and he will be fed all day. Teach a person to fish and he will certainly get his hook caught in his eyelid or something like that.



Even if you're borrowing something from a neighbor, it's still best to do it under cover of darkness.



My father never believed in me. I will not repeat his mistakes: from today I will be gentler with my son. And tougher with my father.

Life is just a bunch of crap that happens.



Homer Simpson may look like a fool, but the animated series has won dozens of different awards and has become a cult favorite and famous all over the world. Whether you should take an example from one of the main fathers of America or not is up to you to decide. Perhaps he will become your anti-hero or life guide.